I like Bill Maher, I really do. He's funny, articulate, unafraid to speak out to whomever holds power (and he's kinda cute, too).

I do grow weary of his recent focus on religion.  While I understand how it can feel to have the majority stuff their beliefs down one's throat; how that might prompt one to get a bit of one's own back, I am disappointed that Maher seems to do so from a less-informed basis than he uses to approach politics.

Case in point:  In the recent, fascinating, Newsweek issue, Maher discusses religion briefly with his opposite, Joe Scarborough.  Maher says, "Your priorities shouldn't be saving your own ass, which is the focus of Christianity. The focus should be, I'm a good person, and I do that just for the sake of being good. Like the Christmas song says, 'Be good for goodness' sake.' "

Leaving aside for the moment that Maher quotes Santa Claus is Coming To Town as his moral authority, I take issue when Maher says Christianity focuses on saving one's own "ass."

While its true that there is a wedge demographic (mostly fundamentalists) that believe in a doctrine known as the "Prosperity Doctrine," not all...I'd wager not even the majority, of Christians adhere to this belief.  Briefly, it says that one is on a personal path to heaven via Jesus Christ.  That if you get it right, you will be rewarded in this life with riches, healthy, good life, etc.

The prosperity doctrine comes from our Calvinist roots.  But it doesn't even begin to touch the key messages of Christianity--respect for God, service to one's fellow humans, personal reflection on God's direction for your particular life in pursuit of those goals.

I find Maher's diffident and ill-informed response disappointing. I am a Christian (and recovering fundamentalist).  I prefer to put my hand in the hand of the man who stilled the water.  (Bonus points for whomever can quote the source of that lyric.)  To follow the teachings of Jesus when he says, "Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."

Cuteness, and Calvinist doctrines, only take us so far.  C'mon Bill.  Get your story straight.
 
 

Had a great talk with Erik Kieser today about the faith journeys we've both been on in our lives.  I first said the prayer to become a Christian back when my hand was pierced by a pitchfork by my brother, Bob.

Depressed, stressed by recent abuse by a neighbor, in shock--I told my Mom "I might as well die.  Only bad things ever happen to me."  Mind you, I was about 11 years old. 

I'd been to church most of my young life, so I knew the story of Jesus.  But it was Mom who told me that day about his sacrifice so that I could live...and in that telling, something indelible took hold of my soul.  It would be another 5 years before the "born again" experience of my teenage years.  I worshipped God; loved His radical son, Jesus; felt the whispers of God's spirit in my deepest heart.

Somewhere along the way...partly due to the churches we went to, partly due to my past and my own mixed up thoughts, I forgot about the powerful, muscular, radical Jesus of the Bible.  I confused him with the message some churches teach about fitting into behavioral boxes of piety, self-denial, and martyrdom.  Jesus became the ultimate co-dependent in my mind.  He always gave all of himself away to everyone else.  And thus, so should I.

Except for two itty bitty points. 

1.  Jesus did not always give away all of himself to everyone else.  He went to the desert for 40 days and 40 nights to be alone, to wrestle with himself, his ministry, his temptations. 

He certainly didn't give himself away to the Sadducees and the Pharisees.  He answered their questions with more questions.  Questions designed to show their theological and philosophical flaws.  Not very "nice" of him.

And often, when he healed people, he acted strangely...either asking them to keep it a secret or asking them to proclaim the miracle.  Inconsistent of him.

He stopped people from stoning a woman.  He spoke with an unacceptable woman at a well.  He ate with sinners and tax collectors.  (Today's equivalent might be sitting down to a meal with AIG executives and the octuplet mom.)  But when he sat with these people, he asked them life-changing questions.  He did not pity or patronize them.  He challenged them.

2.  While I believe with all my heart that God wants us to be more like Christ, I also believe that I am human.  I make mistakes.  I fail to live up to standards of even moderate perfection let alone Christ-like purity.  Especially a false Christ.  The doormat Christ.  The one who looks and acts nothing at all like the person we see if we read the Bible.

It is such a blessing to be free of this delusion.  I realize that some of my readers aren't of the Christian faith.  Thank you for reading this entry anyway (assuming you've gotten this far).  Because I also believe that, whether or not you follow Christ, this realization today that I'd traded in my powerful beliefs for a group-think facsimilie has resonance with every human of every (and of no) faith.

We have some powerful paradigms in our culture about what it means to be "good," to be "successful."  We have very few examples of authenticity and the personal and cultural power it imbues.  I'm so grateful for a conversation with an old friend that reminded me of one such example and also affirmed my journey and my reasons for parting ways with the Fundamentalist church.

 
 

To be perfectly honest, it was really walks and A restaurant, but I did feel well enough to go on some excursions today.  That's a definite blessing and a win (thanks, God!).  I started the day being somewhat "slantsy" as Ken coined the term--a combination of sleepy and ansty brought on by the lack of sleep the last few days and by the compazine, I believe, which has been so effective at managing the nausea but also has a jumpiness side effect.  Hence...slantsy.

After the compazine wore away, with no ill effects literally, we braved an outing to our favorite local Mexican restaurant (Avila's Restaurant on La Paz) where I had chicken soup.  Somewhat typically, I saved half of the soup for dinner and then forgot it on the table.  <sigh>

The rest of the day has been passed in the pleasant pursuits of phone conversations with friends and family, of hanging out with Cindy, with Ken and Dan, in watching a documentary (more on that later) and in talking an afternoon constitutional.  The weather is exceptional outside...a nice change from the frigid temperatures we've been having.  I didn't walk as far as I have walked but I walked farther than yesterday.  As Cindy Siler said in her post the other day..."Welcome to the roller coaster ride called 'fighting cancer.' "  I must say, I prefer these upward days.

The documentary we watched was called Jesus Camp.  The film follows a youth pastor (Becky Fischer) as she seeks to influence young kids for Christ.  Her perspective is staunchly conservative, evangelical and charismatic.  It was fascinating to watch, no matter which side of the political or religious spectrum from which you hie, the influence of group dynamics on these kids.

I found the kids' sincerity to be uplifiting and ultimately hopeful.  I found the conflation of religion and politics to be disturbing.  I found Miss Fischer to be a compelling and sympathetic person whose absolute conviction of the truth of her brand of Christianity to be entirely in sync with her efforts.

Overall, I thought the movie came from a left bias.  Cindy and I were not sure if producers were aware of the ironies provided by the left(ish) broadcaster who appeared in parts of the film with his own brand of "true religion."

The film sparked a wonderful conversation among Ken, Cindy and me as we discussed various aspects of our faith, and shared some quotes, prayers and verses that have been meaningful to us on our spiritual journies. 

I find the topic of interest because, as I've indicated before on this blog, I started my Christian life at a fairly young age, progressed from Methodist to Conservative Baptist, to Presbyterian and back to Baptist--all the while coming to terms with "articles of faith" that I did not find illustrated in the Bible or in the lives of Christians who clearly loved and followed God.  (Sometimes despite what they said.)  I've come to believe in a Creator of infinite compassion.  I believe in that Creator within the framework of Christianity because that it is the religion that speaks to my heart of a central truth...a God who loves the world so much that he gives his only begotten son so that no one would perish.  I don't know the mysteries or intricacies of how that works.

And that statement alone is probably what led to my break with the conservative church.  It has long been my prayer that if I err, I hope it is on the side of compassion.

At any rate, with regard to the film, I'd say if you have an interest in Christianity and Politics...and the crossroads at which they meet in our nation, this film is worth your time.

Rent it.  Watch it with someone who will be willing to discuss it. 


 
Movi Prep 11/25/2008
 

The alternate title for this blog is "I better write this while I can!"  I'm taking the lovely and delicious concoction known as Movi Prep to clean out my insides so that I can have a colonoscopy tomorrow.  Normally, I wouldn't share that, but since it's to discover whether or not colon cancer is the source of my tumors, it's become blog worthy in the current context.

I've already had two friends vow to have their colonoscopies done due to my situation, so that makes me quite happy.  And a daughter's friend has promised to quit smoking.  Score another point for the good guys.

I continue to have some emotional ups and downs, as one would expect of anyone in this situation.  Today has been filled with some wonderful, peaceful moments as well.  Prayer with Shari.  Gorgeous clouds on the horizon as the weather changes.  Conversations with friends from coast to coast.

I spent some time journaling out on the patio this morning--wrapping my head around some differences of opinion between myself and some dear friends about our contrasting definitions of what it means to be passionate about God.  I came to peace once more with the knowledge that the Creator and I are on better terms than ever before in my life.  I released their opinions back to them while appreciating the spirit of their prayers for my personal spiritual revival.

One of the things I've had reaffirmed to me over the past 7 days...count 'em, 7...I went into the hospital a six days and 11 hours ago...is that the path I've been traveling due to various crises (a friend wrongly convicted of a serious crime, various health issues with beloved parents and family members, the long overdue resolution of traumatic events that occured when I was very young), has been preparation of sorts for this latest challenge.

My relationship with God when I was young was full of fire and conviction, it is true.  But like the strength I displayed in my younger years, it was also brittle, rule-bound, and shallow rooted.

The relationship I treasure with our Creator now is one that has been tempered in the crucible of unfair and inexplicable losses; one that has been affirmed in the darkest, most surreal moments of real life; one that has been given to me so graciously and freely by a God who (as Todd said) loves me and wants me to be happy and yet, in the paradox that infuses the juxtaposition of human and divine, is also one that I've had to wrest from the ashes when it seemed like God doesn't really care at all.

I couldn't walk this path without my husband.  I couldn't face the climb without my family.  I wouldn't have the strength to contemplate tomorrow without my friends.  And without my creator, I'd have no reason to hope in either the journey or the outcome.

I am truly blessed to have all of these folks, from God to husband, from family who are friends to friends who are family, all of them on "team Laura."